Some of you may have heard of Blackberry’s bold, new strategy in the field of smartphones, which worries me to some degree. Not in any conventional sense you might think, of course.
It’s transitory. You see, eventually, I’ll have to migrate because at this moment the company is flowing up shit creek without paddle.
Even worse, here I am, standing on the edge and furiously masturbating hoping that the kinetic energy from my ejaculation will give us some semblance of thrust upon which it’ll send the company in the right direction.
But it doesn’t. No matter how furiously I stroke my wallet, it just won’t work, and at the end of the day, the ship is just going to sink or switch hands or corporate bigwigs will throw me overboard while they puff their cigars and conjure up enterprise-only paddles.
So for that eventual migration, I’ll need to get used to either iOS or Android. As someone who came from iOS, the logical answer would be to go back, but having messed around with my sister’s phone, I just can’t.
You see, I’ve gotten used to the gesture system. It’s a nice system. Sure, Blackberry is ominously lacking in applications, from the most basic ones like Netflix to the more obscure ones like Hulu, but using a Z10 since its released has sort of grown on me. I don’t use apps anymore, even on iPhones or iPads. They just sit there, staring at me blankly as I mindless try to access my emails by swipe in nondescript fashion. It’s weird.
Blackberry never really catered to me, I ended up catering to Blackberry, and in some sort of weird, malevolent tech contortion, I became a swirling mess of true multitasking and unified hubdom.
I liked, like, it. All other seem alien to me, and I’m so used to the three step management of apps that I’m truly shocked. A while ago, nose-thumbing me would have happily and nonchalantly spoken with dispassionate tones about Blackberry’s demise.
But now…now…it just sucks, and I know it sucks. I really, really, really like this phone, but I also know that it’s essentially forced me to dance to its tune, and not everyone liked that.
So I guess in all earnestness, this is as close as I can get to a serious take on the Blackberry. I wish the best for the company, but I must be honest in that I am not looking forward to falling into shit creek, cause I just can’t swim.